ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
MONDAY, 25 MAY 2026
Kids grow up so fast.
Except between 5pm and bedtime, when time stops and you age a decade.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Move fast and break things. You broke the coffee machine, the budget and your…
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- You put "open to work" on LinkedIn. Six recruiters viewed your profile. Five were…
- You've "romanticised your life". It's a candle, a croissant and a playlist called "main…
- You said "it's giving" about your own life. It's giving overdraft. It's giving rent…
- Your company's core values are printed on the wall. So nobody has to have…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 444
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