ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see my screen?"
You can. You always will.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Early access means you paid to watch someone not finish something. You do that…
- Somebody, somewhere, is checking their phone hoping it's you. It's a debt collector.
- Your startup is a chatbot that tells customers they're right. Investors loved it. The…
- Age is just a number. So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than…
- Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime. They said…
- “I'm here for the right reasons.” The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a…
- They're taking time away from social media. You know because they posted about it…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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