ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
True love is choosing the same person every day.
They're choosing, daily, whether to mention your chewing.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- You call it "quiet quitting". Your manager calls it "the same as before". Nobody…
- Wisdom comes with age. So does standing on the landing with no idea why…
- Every company now has an AI assistant. It's the only member of staff nobody's…
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
- You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up. Eleven kilometres later you'd caught…
- You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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