ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Find your purpose.
It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key to a flat you'll never live in again.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your birthday cake now needs a risk assessment. The candles are outnumbering the years…
- The first email you open on Monday is a reply-all from Friday. Forty replies.…
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- You left them on read "to be mysterious". They didn't notice. They were also…
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- Your savings account isn't empty. It's a memorial.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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