ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're "chronically online".
Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have a loading icon.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said "this is my year". You've said it since 2019. The years have…
- Your step counter used to set goals. Now it just sends "Hello?" like a…
- No pain, no gain. You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your…
- The retirement age goes up a year every time you check. It's not a…
- Kids grow up so fast. Except between 5pm and bedtime, when time stops and…
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams than you've had about anything since…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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