ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you.
It's not proud. It's given up. Even the bird has moved on.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Move fast and break things. You broke the coffee machine, the budget and your…
- Work smarter, not harder. You've chosen neither, and HR has a folder.
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
- Doom spending is buying a heated eye mask because the news was bad. The…
- You say "it's not that deep" a lot. Your Notes app has 300 entries…
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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