ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up.
Eleven kilometres later you'd caught three pigeons, a cold and a physio waiting list that will outlive the app.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- Your friends' group chat went quiet. It didn't. They made a new one. Same…
- You said you'd "touch grass" this weekend. You took a photo of grass, posted…
- You said you're "so busy" this week. Your screen time says eleven hours a…
- You said you'd "touch grass" this weekend. You took a photo of grass, posted…
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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