ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
"It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years.
You're the phase they'll describe to a therapist.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Think outside the box. The box had the budget. You're out here with a…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- You have 47 tabs open. Three are jobs you'll never apply for, one's a…
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- A budget is a list of things you're about to do anyway. Written down…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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