ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 28 MAY 2003
You manifested your dream job.
The universe received the request, checked your CV and moved you to spam.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- You've got a side hustle, a passion project and a podcast. Combined monthly income:…
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
- You call yourself "a bit of a foodie". You've ordered the same chicken 64…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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