ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Make your money work for you.
Yours quit in 2019. It works for your landlord now.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Every subscription you forgot about still thinks of you monthly. That's more than your…
- You said you'd "touch grass" this weekend. You took a photo of grass, posted…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- You're "in your villain era". You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times.…
- Core collaboration days started as Tuesday. They now include Wednesday, Thursday, a Friday that's…
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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