ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
No pain, no gain.
You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your file.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Things will look better in the morning. No. They'll just be better lit.
- Your back now goes out when you sneeze. It goes out more than you…
- You've "romanticised your life". It's a candle, a croissant and a playlist called "main…
- Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime. They said…
- Think outside the box. The box had the budget. You're out here with a…
- You received 40 fundraising texts today. Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
- Your 5am routine went viral. You did it once, filmed it, and have slept…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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