ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You typed "speak to an agent" nine times.
The bot sent you a help article about speaking to agents. The agents were let go in March.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
- Your boss hasn't taken a sick day in ten years. He has, however, given…
- Your 5am routine went viral. You did it once, filmed it, and have slept…
- Consistency is key. You've said "I'll go tomorrow" for three years. It's the only…
- Monday is a core collaboration day. As, it turns out, is every day ending…
- Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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