ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You deleted the app "for good".
That was 40 minutes ago. You've reinstalled it and posted about deleting it.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Quality family time: everyone on a different screen in the same room, harvested by…
- Every subscription you forgot about still thinks of you monthly. That's more than your…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- You call yourself "a bit of a foodie". You've ordered the same chicken 64…
- You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up. Eleven kilometres later you'd caught…
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 444
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