ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You're "in your villain era".
You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times. Villains have done less damage at a christening.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Abs are made in the kitchen. So are toasties. The toasties are undefeated.
- Every great company started in a garage. Yours will end there too. The car's…
- The update is 200GB. Your free afternoon was smaller.
- The form needs a form. The second form is not currently available.
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
- Start the week strong. Or at 9:14, camera off, pretending your face is a…
- You bought the yoga mat. The cat uses it. The cat is more flexible,…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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