ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You say you're "an old soul".
You're 21. The only old thing about you is your phone's battery health.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The retirement age goes up a year every time you check. It's not a…
- You've got a side hustle, a passion project and a podcast. Combined monthly income:…
- You rage quit because the game was rigged. You were also just bad. Both…
- You're "healing your inner child". Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult…
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- Your Sunday-night plan for Monday was ambitious. Monday read it, laughed, and forwarded it…
- Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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