ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You got the ick because they ran for a bus.
You've been single three years and you run for nothing. Including opportunities.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your complaint has been escalated. It is now ignored by someone more senior.
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- Your savings account isn't empty. It's a memorial.
- You said "this is my year". You've said it since 2019. The years have…
- You "don't believe in labels". You believe in being kept as an option.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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