ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress".
It said the same when you opened it by accident. It'll keep saying it after you've gone, if nobody cancels the subscription.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The retirement age goes up a year every time you check. It's not a…
- AI agrees with you more than any human ever has. That's not wisdom. That's…
- The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see…
- "Let's take this offline" means "let's never speak of this again." That's also the…
- You'll never get on the property ladder. The only plot you'll ever own is…
- You said you're "so busy" this week. Your screen time says eleven hours a…
- Your squad misses you, says the notification. Your squad is four strangers and a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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