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The Sadist Times

SATIRE · THIS STORY IS FICTIONAL

SADIST TIMES / ShowbizFILE No. 1356-K

LOVE BUNGALOW RUNNER-UP SAYS SHE WAS ‘THERE FOR THE RIGHT REASONS’, CANNOT NAME ONE

Former contestant now has a teeth-whitening deal, a clothing line and ‘no regrets’, which she also cannot name.

Kayleigh Strand, 27, runner-up in the fourth series of the invented reality show Love Bungalow, has told a podcast that she entered the villa “for the right reasons”, but was unable to name any of them when asked.

“I was there for love,” she said, before pausing. “And for, like, the experience. And for growth. And love.” Asked which of those had happened, she said “the growth”, and gestured to her follower count, which has grown by 1.4 million.

Since leaving the show, Strand has launched a teeth-whitening partnership, a clothing line, a fake tan and an “honest” documentary about her time in the villa, filmed by the same production company.

Her on-screen partner, from whom she split nine days after the final, has launched a rival fake tan.

A spokesperson for the invented Reality Television Standards Bureau said contestants are carefully screened to ensure they are there for the right reasons. “We ask them directly,” she said. “They all say yes. We have a form.”

Strand said she is now looking for love “outside the cameras”, and will be documenting the search across four platforms.

The search is sponsored.

This article is satire. The people, places, quotes and studies described are fictional.

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