ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You have an eleven-step skincare routine.
Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is doing its best. It isn't a miracle worker.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- There's someone out there for everyone. Yours married someone else in 2019. They look…
- The house will be tidy again one day. The day they move out. Tidy,…
- AI agrees with you more than any human ever has. That's not wisdom. That's…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
- There's no I in team. There are two in "invoice still unpaid". And one…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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