ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The in-office lunch is optional.
The man with the clipboard and no sandwich is writing down who didn't come. Then who did, but looked replaceable.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You have a "5-year plan". It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
- You "grew out of" your old friends. They grew out of waiting for you…
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
- You flipped a water bottle on Monday morning just to feel something. It landed.…
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
- Some days you're the pigeon. Most days you're the statue, and nobody remembers who…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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