ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 12 JULY 2025
You have 2,000 followers and nobody to help you move.
Your audience is very engaged. Just not with lifting a sofa.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You have 47 tabs open. Three are jobs you'll never apply for, one's a…
- You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up. Eleven kilometres later you'd caught…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped…
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
- Your bio says "foodie, traveller, dreamer". You've been abroad once, and you still talk…
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 444
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