ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
WEDNESDAY, 13 SEPTEMBER 1961
You have an eleven-step skincare routine.
Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is doing its best. It isn't a miracle worker.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said "that's so me" about a horoscope. It also described 600 million other…
- The best time to start saving was twenty years ago. The second-best time was…
- You deleted the app "for good". That was 40 minutes ago. You've reinstalled it…
- You said you're "booked and busy". Booked for a dentist you'll cancel. Busy rewatching…
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- A tidy playroom lasts exactly as long as it takes to photograph. The photo…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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