ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Coffee doesn't fix Monday.
It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- A budget is a list of things you're about to do anyway. Written down…
- You asked the internet whether you were the bad guy. The internet read the…
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- Your friends' group chat went quiet. It didn't. They made a new one. Same…
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- Being single means nobody steals your duvet. It also means the duvet is the…
- You said "my For You page knows me so well". It knows you're awake…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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