ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world.
Your overdraft found it first. It's been compounding you since 2017.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime. They said…
- You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- Your startup is a chatbot that tells customers they're right. Investors loved it. The…
- Early access means you paid to watch someone not finish something. You do that…
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- You can do anything you set your mind to. Your mind has set itself…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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