ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your 47 open tabs are an accurate map of your inner life.
Someone will close them after the funeral. Unread.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your Sunday-night plan for Monday was ambitious. Monday read it, laughed, and forwarded it…
- You're "in your villain era". You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times.…
- Core collaboration days started as Tuesday. They now include Wednesday, Thursday, a Friday that's…
- You have an eleven-step skincare routine. Your sleep schedule has none. The serum is…
- Money can't buy happiness. You'll never have enough to check.
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
- Step outside your comfort zone. It's raining out there, everything costs more, and nobody…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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