ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your savings account isn't empty.
It's a memorial.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- You've "romanticised your life". It's a candle, a croissant and a playlist called "main…
- “Too close to call” means nobody knows. It is said by people paid a…
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- Early access means you paid to watch someone not finish something. You do that…
- You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month. The call took 94…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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