ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Everyone's bringing back the dog filter.
Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look on its own since March, and it doesn't come off when you close the app.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
- You've got a side hustle, a passion project and a podcast. Combined monthly income:…
- Hard work pays off eventually. It's paying off right now. Your boss just bought…
- Things will look better in the morning. No. They'll just be better lit.
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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