ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month.
The call took 94 minutes. You break even in 2031. They put it back up in 2027.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The update is 200GB. Your free afternoon was smaller.
- Some people run marathons. You run late, and you still come last.
- The retirement age goes up a year every time you check. It's not a…
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- The house will be tidy again one day. The day they move out. Tidy,…
- Passive income takes a surprising amount of active effort. Mostly explaining it at parties…
- Your company will send flowers to your funeral. They'll be charged to your department's…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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