ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 16 OCTOBER 1986
"Let's take this offline" means "let's never speak of this again."
That's also the plan for your job next quarter.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
- You moneymaxxed so hard this month you earned $4.80 in cashback. It cost three…
- Somebody, somewhere, is checking their phone hoping it's you. It's a debt collector.
- You've "romanticised your life". It's a candle, a croissant and a playlist called "main…
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- Your alarm didn't wake you. The dread did. It doesn't have a snooze button.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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