ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You said "that's so me" about a horoscope.
It also described 600 million other people and a goldfish.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Lessons will be learned. By whom, and when, will also be learned. Eventually. Possibly.
- You went "no contact" with your ex. You still check their Spotify. They're listening…
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- You asked the internet whether you were the bad guy. The internet read the…
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- "Let's take this offline" means "let's never speak of this again." That's also the…
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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