ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Every parent has a favourite child.
It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your 47 open tabs are an accurate map of your inner life. Someone will…
- Mistakes were made. The Notes app has never once said by whom.
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
- “I'm here for the right reasons.” The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a…
- You said "that's so me" about a horoscope. It also described 600 million other…
- You have a "5-year plan". It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
- Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone. Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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