ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You've "found your aesthetic".
It's beige. It's always beige.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You've been "circling back" since March. At this point you're space debris.
- Your boss hasn't taken a sick day in ten years. He has, however, given…
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
- Your step counter used to set goals. Now it just sends "Hello?" like a…
- You'll never get on the property ladder. The only plot you'll ever own is…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- You can't take money with you when you go. Your direct debits, however, will…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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