ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 13 JULY 1989
You said "my For You page knows me so well".
It knows you're awake and lonely at 2 a.m. That's not a gift. That's data.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Passive income takes a surprising amount of active effort. Mostly explaining it at parties…
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- It's not a career ladder. It's a hamster wheel. The hamster has a LinkedIn…
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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