ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
True love is choosing the same person every day.
They're choosing, daily, whether to mention your chewing.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
- Kids grow up so fast. Except between 5pm and bedtime, when time stops and…
- Inside every older person is a younger person. The younger person is furious about…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- You're not broke. You're pre-rich. The "pre" is permanent.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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