ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 26 MARCH 1994
There's someone out there for everyone.
Yours married someone else in 2019. They look happy.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You spent £400 on an ergonomic chair. You sit on it like a frog.…
- The consultation runs for twelve weeks. The decision was made in week zero.
- They're taking time away from social media. You know because they posted about it…
- You're "healing your inner child". Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult…
- Every summit sends a very strong signal. The planet keeps not receiving it.
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
- Your inbox reached zero once. The server was down. You were briefly free and…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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