ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Being single means nobody steals your duvet.
It also means the duvet is the only witness to your life.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- There's someone out there for everyone. Yours married someone else in 2019. They look…
- You spent £400 on an ergonomic chair. You sit on it like a frog.…
- The consultation runs for twelve weeks. The decision was made in week zero.
- They're taking time away from social media. You know because they posted about it…
- You're "healing your inner child". Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult…
- Every summit sends a very strong signal. The planet keeps not receiving it.
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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