ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You said you're "so busy" this week.
Your screen time says eleven hours a day. Busy is one word for it. Scrolling is the other.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Money can't buy happiness. You'll never have enough to check.
- You asked the internet whether you were the bad guy. The internet read the…
- Dating apps let you meet hundreds of people. All of them are "just seeing…
- You "don't do small talk". You also don't do big talk, phone calls, emails…
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
- You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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