ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You have a "5-year plan".
It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- They're taking time away from social media. You know because they posted about it…
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands. It will be the…
- Move fast and break things. You broke the coffee machine, the budget and your…
- Someone laminated an "Acceptable Behaviour" poster for the office kitchen. It will still be…
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
- Your 5am routine went viral. You did it once, filmed it, and have slept…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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