ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Every company now has an AI assistant.
It's the only member of staff nobody's asked to come in on Fridays, and the only one getting your job.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- You're "in your villain era". You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times.…
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- You put "entrepreneur" in your bio. You've sold one pair of trainers on Vinted…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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