ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing.
When you leave, someone will fight over the plant.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're ageing like a fine wine. Expensive, slightly sour, best kept in the dark,…
- You left them on read "to be mysterious". They didn't notice. They were also…
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
- You say "it's not that deep" a lot. Your Notes app has 300 entries…
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
- Running clears your head. Mostly of the idea that you're a runner.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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