ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
MONDAY, 10 APRIL 2017
There's someone out there for everyone.
Yours married someone else in 2019. They look happy.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You have 47 tabs open. Three are jobs you'll never apply for, one's a…
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- You've "romanticised your life". It's a candle, a croissant and a playlist called "main…
- The customer is always right. The customer is also on hold, forever, which is…
- Somebody, somewhere, is checking their phone hoping it's you. It's a debt collector.
- The in-office lunch is optional. The man with the clipboard and no sandwich is…
- Early access means you paid to watch someone not finish something. You do that…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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