ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You film "Sunday reset" videos.
By Tuesday your room has reset itself, to Saturday.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You've been "circling back" since March. At this point you're space debris.
- You said "that's so me" about a horoscope. It also described 600 million other…
- Compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world. Your overdraft found it first.…
- Love is patient. Your partner is not, and has started a note on their…
- Step outside your comfort zone. It's raining out there, everything costs more, and nobody…
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
- You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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