ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime.
They said that last time. Your lifetime is very important.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Parenthood is a long journey from "mama" to "can you send money" to them…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- You're not broke. You're pre-rich. The "pre" is permanent.
- You've "romanticised your life". It's a candle, a croissant and a playlist called "main…
- You don't skip leg day. You skip every day. The legs know. The legs…
- You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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