ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
"It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years.
You're the phase they'll describe to a therapist.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
- You said "we move". You've lived in the same bedroom since you were nine.
- You've got a side hustle, a passion project and a podcast. Combined monthly income:…
- “Just one more game” of FIFA was the most dishonest sentence in the English…
- Micro-dating is a thirty-minute coffee to see if there's a spark. There wasn't. She…
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- "We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise. One of you will die…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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