ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner.
You'll eat standing up for eighteen years. Then sit down and forget how.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- When you're gone, the one who misses you most will be the algorithm. It…
- Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing. When you…
- Your birthday cake now needs a risk assessment. The candles are outnumbering the years…
- Everything happens for a reason. The reason is you. It's always been you.
- Running clears your head. Mostly of the idea that you're a runner.
- You flipped a water bottle on Monday morning just to feel something. It landed.…
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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