ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
A good night out now means home by ten.
Nobody had to come and get you. Nobody offered.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your bio says "foodie, traveller, dreamer". You've been abroad once, and you still talk…
- Till death do us part. Not a vow. A fixed-term contract with an unspecified…
- Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing. When you…
- Fortnite was free to play. It was not free to stop.
- The pothole is on the list. The list is dynamic. The pothole is permanent.
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- You're "so random". You've told the same "so random" story at every party since…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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