ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
FRIDAY, 9 JUNE 1961
They're on a comeback tour.
It's the fourth. They have never been anywhere long enough to come back from.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're "healing your inner child". Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult…
- Things will look better in the morning. No. They'll just be better lit.
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- Fortnite was free to play. It was not free to stop.
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- They posted an apology in the Notes app. It was addressed to the fans.…
- Your boss hasn't taken a sick day in ten years. He has, however, given…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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