ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You'll never get on the property ladder.
The only plot you'll ever own is two metres deep, and there's a waiting list.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Don't settle. Your standards already have. They didn't tell you.
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- Good things come to those who wait. You waited so long they went to…
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
- Every Monday you swear this week will be different. You've sworn it nine hundred…
- Your 47 open tabs are an accurate map of your inner life. Someone will…
- Find your purpose. It's in the drawer with the takeaway menus and a key…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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