ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
“I'm here for the right reasons.”
The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a fake tan.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You have 2,000 followers and nobody to help you move. Your audience is very…
- Being single means nobody steals your duvet. It also means the duvet is the…
- You'll leave your children everything you have. It's mostly a bread maker and an…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
- Mistakes were made. The Notes app has never once said by whom.
- Your financial advisor is a spreadsheet you opened once in January. It's been screaming…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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