ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You pre-ordered it for the cape.
The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You did the Mannequin Challenge again for old times' sake. The standing still was…
- Your company will send flowers to your funeral. They'll be charged to your department's…
- The pothole is on the list. The list is dynamic. The pothole is permanent.
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- Love is patient. Your partner is not, and has started a note on their…
- You'll never get on the property ladder. The only plot you'll ever own is…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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